this post was submitted on 17 May 2024
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Food Crimes - Offenses against nutrition

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Welcome to Food Crimes! This community is here to collect all and any post about cursed food and generally unusual consumables.

Right now, here’s the rules:

  1. Posts must include an image or video containing food or drink.
  2. It must be unusual or cursed in some way. a. For example, something like Doritos Milk would be unusual, but normal milk would not.
  3. No AI posts whatsoever, and any images that were altered (Ex: Photoshop, Gimp) need to be tagged.

How to tag: To tag your posts, please prepend or append the tag name inside square brackets. For example,[OC] Foo bar baz or foo bar baz [Meta] would be acceptable. Multiple tags will require separate pairs of brackets, like so: [Edited][OC] foo bar baz

Here are the current tags:

Finished checking out all the posts here? Also checkout !shittyfoodporn@lemmy.ca!

(BTW, I’m looking for someone to help mod here! I myself would not be enough if this community goes beyond a few posts a day.)

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[–] Nemo@midwest.social 2 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Wait, why is the knife covered in PB? Didn't you put it on the bread?

[–] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I have not yet achieved the level of skill with peanut butter required to get all of it off the knife. Most, yes, but there's still a plainly visible amount left.

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Use the other slice of bread like a chamois to wipe it clean. Now the skill is within your grasp.

[–] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

But then I'm gonna get peanut butter on the bread I'm going to put jelly on. What if the spoon gets contaminated, and then I put it back in the jar for the next person?

...Wait nevermind, that's not a problem, I use a squeeze bottle.

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

wait, wait, you keep the jelly spoon in the jar?

how deep does this rabbit hole of madness go?!

[–] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 3 points 5 months ago

No, no, just as a kid when multiple of us would be making PBJs in sequence. Whoever's last gets to lick the spoon before it goes in the sink.

[–] somethingsnappy@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Why did the knife go in the pb first? It goes in the jelly, then gets washed off in 2 seconds in the sink, then goes in the pb.

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Wait, wait, you put the PB on top of the jelly? Like a jelly sandwich garnished with peanut butter? I don't think I'm understanding you correctly.

[–] somethingsnappy@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

What kind of peon eats an open faced pb&j? (Unless it's on toast)

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 1 points 4 months ago

We are definitely talking past each other at this point.