this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2024
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[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation
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Most of the bars I've been to are really loud and it's almost impossible to hear anyone talking to me, so I just invite my friends to my apartment. I spend less on alcohol that way too...
If I want to hang out while doing something, I suggest going to a restaurant because that's an experience I can't replicate at home. (I don't cook very well.)
One problem that I forgot to mention is that I am a male who works with and meets a lot of women. I also tend to mesh better with women than men. However, even though I'm non-binary, if I meet a new person who is a woman, it feels a little too something-or-other to invite them into my home when we still don't know each other that well. Bars are a neutral, public, casual space.
That's a very good point. When I was younger, I was naive and thought I could invite women over the same way as I could invite men. I must have made most of them uncomfortable (and probably disappointed the ones who did come over).
It's less weird if you have a group of people over, as long as everyone knows it's a group thing. That's my default (I find bars too loud for conversation)--board/party games and drinks are a great combo.