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I get you're coming from a good place, but we're disabled, not handicapped
Just a language thing, sorry. In my country this word does not have any negative connotation.
I think it's much more likely that it does have negative connotations (especially since the etymology of the word itself is negative, there is no way around that. Never mind the stigma it carries), but no one has pointed it out to you until this point.
But now you know, and since language matters, please just say the word and in future call us what we are - disabled people.
I genuinely have multiple friends who use that word about themselves. It isn't negative unless people perceive so.
First of all, thanks for proving you've not bothered reading any of the information I linked, because it clearly states otherwise:
Second of all, disabled people reclaiming a word for themselves, no matter how friendly you are with them, still doesn't give you the right to use it to describe the rest of us (or at all except for if your friends specifically asked you to, and I'd honestly consider whether they actually want to be called that, or that they know that you would react as badly as you are here, so don't bother to correct you because they have better things to spend their energy on than educating a "friend" who would use them as debate tools to prove how not ableist you are. Hint: doing that is ableist), just like you don't go around using the N word or the F and T slurs, all of which have been reclaimed by their own community but are still derogatory when used by outsiders.
So like I told that other person:
you can choose to be respectful and make the tiniest adjustment to your vocabulary, or you can choose to continue to use a harmful term despite now knowing full well that it is harmful, proving to me and others just how little of a shit you give about disabled people.
I've done my part, the choice is yours, and you're clearly choosing to prioritise your own ego over respecting disabled people on the most basic level.
Which I guess only leaves me feeling sorry for your "friends" (or should I say tokens?)
My point is that words are part of languages which change very fluidly, and you could make the same argument for hundreds of other words.
If the word isn't considered bad by anyone hearing it or anyone it describes, nothing is wrong with it. Many meanings are different between your language and mine, even though they sound alike or share some etymology.
You can't criticize people for using the word handicapped after it has been pushed as the politically correct word for decades.
It's still the mainstream politically correct word in the English speaking West. Using disabled can land you in hot water in a professional or political environment.
That's a pile of bullshit so big it could only come from an abled person who hasn't spent a second of their life listening to actual disabled people.
So I can, and I will.
And people can then choose to be respectful and make the tiniest adjustment to their vocabulary, or they can choose to continue to use a harmful term despite now knowing full well that it is harmful, proving to others just how little of a shit they give about disabled people.
The choice is yours.