this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2024
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The society that we know of are not kind to parents.
Though govt benefits for maternity care are quite good (thank you Mama Risa), pero parang your own your own na after mo manganak.
Not only that pero napaka-toxic din kasi ng mga Filipinos sa parents/kids.
I get it, anti-natalist kayo (not you OP) and may issues with children mostly out of your own horrible experiences with them โ your parents being shitty, your family giving you shit for not having one, unruly kids bothering you at the coffee shop when you want peace of mind, and so on. But that doesn't mean you should continue the cycle and be similarly grouchy and hold unhealthy opinions of every other family you encounter.
That parent seemingly laughing at their kid horsing around in a public setting? For all we know they're filled with shame, puyat, and just putting a brave face because they don't want to be that type of parent that scolds children regardless if that type of discipline worked for you. They brought them to that restaurant probably because they're hungry and needed air, and couldn't afford a yaya, and they don't have family members to babysit by committee.
If you don't have the resources to properly provide for the child then why make one in the first place? Everyone has their reasons for childbearing, I'm not going to touch on that. That said, not everyone had the same privileges but they were able to make it work. My parents didn't take care of me as a kid, but I'm here. My grandparents were poor as shit and managed to send their kids to college and live the rest of their lives in comfort as a result, and that's why I exist. My friends, co-workers, relatives, they all make me wonder how they manage to raise kids at their salary and this economy, but they're doing okay. You, fellow lemmings, I would hazard a guess, started (or still are) not well-off either. But your parents made it work.
Yes, may shitty parents na walang pakialam, selfish, and has whack priorities, and that's infuriating โ but just like with cops, communists, LGBT, men, drivers, etc. we don't judge them by their worst. And by relegating parenthood sa "may kaya lang" is once again an elitist viewpoint that turns us into a class-style society.