this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2023
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(sorry if anyone got this post twice. I posted while Lemmy.World was down for maintenance, and it was acting weird, so I deleted and reposted)

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[–] Makeitstop@lemmy.world 61 points 1 year ago (10 children)

Guys, do yourself a favor and get a kilt. You will never want to go back. I stopped wearing pants years ago.

[–] KoalaUnknown@lemmy.world 41 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Nah get a mini skirt and thigh highs to assert dominance over the other girls.

[–] superduperenigma@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If I just lookup some Rust programming tutorials will the mini skirts and thigh highs come naturally?

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

iunderstoodthatreference.png

[–] EmoBean@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I wish I could wear miniskirts, my balls hang too low when it's hot.

[–] LetterboxPancake@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Give us kilt novices tips! Where to start, where to buy, what to buy, shave? Commando? High socks?

[–] Makeitstop@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You can find relatively cheap ones online. Damn near kilt em is one I can vouch for as a good first kilt. Or stillwater kilts for something cheap and more traditional looking.

The number one thing to know when buying is that you need to actually measure yourself. Pants lie, kiltmakers generally don't.

If you want something a little nicer, there are plenty of businesses that make kilts to measure. My last few came from alpha kilts, but I think they quit. Alt.kilt does crazy custom stuff. Utilikilt is probably the most famous one, though I've never actually tried theirs.

There's whole communities online for this stuff. I used to get reviews and find new stores on xmarksthescot.

If you get a contemporary kilt, meaning pockets and modern style, you just need a belt. If you go traditional tartan you probably need a sporran or some other kind of bag or pouch since they don’t have pockets. Traditional kilts also typically use a kilt pin to add weight to the front apron to keep it from blowing around too easily.

Tall socks are good formal wear or cold weather. I am a very casual guy and an arctic creature, so I usually just wear closed toe sandals. But if you live in a cold place and need to stay warm, a full size "9 yard" kilt will do the trick, it creates a pocket of warm air, and the legs being together gives it a mitten effect.

You can go commando (aka going regimental, because in highland regiments underwear is considered out of uniform), but I don't recommend it. For one thing, you don't know fear until you've been caught in a gust of 50 mph wind while walking past a school playground on a day that you decided to save time by forgoing underwear, and now you are desperately holding down all sides of a lightweight kilt and trying not to end up on sex offender registry. But on a much more mundane level, it's also just a lot easier to keep your kilt clean when it isn't directly touching your junk or your crack. I wear briefs but I go up a couple sizes, so that the elastic still holds them up but they hang off me when I'm standing, which feels like I'm wearing nothing at all.

Of course, if anyone asks what's worn under the kilt, you have lots of options:

  • Nothing's worn, it's all in excellent condition.
  • If you want to find out it will cost you dinner and a movie first.
  • Shoes
  • On a good day, lipstick
[–] LetterboxPancake@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I joked before, but your excellent answer made me seriously consider buying a kilt. I need to find out how the supply situation is here in Germany. Or I'll ask the seamstress that made my ex wife's wedding dress, she's working for the theater in my city as well. Maybe she'd like a challenge.

Thank you 💖

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Amazon sells good quality ones. I just got one through their "try then buy" program.

Or, use Amazon to find good brands and buy directly from them.

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Remember, go up 2-4 inches from your pants size when buying a kilt. So, if you wear a size 32 pants, get a size 36 kilt. Their waist measurements are actually your waist measurement.

Also, the patterns have specific meanings. No one in the US is going to care, but if you go to Scotland someone may address you by the last name the pattern represents (they're like family crests). There are generic patterns out there, though.

[–] Perhapsjustsniffit@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

I wear a kilt every single day. I love them. I don't even own pants anymore. I'm almost 50 and my "give a fuck what other people think"is used up.

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Fuck pants, tunics and kilts rule.

[–] Jesse@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 year ago (3 children)

What are fuck pants? If they rule as much as kilts and tunics I want some.

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

They have a permanently open fly.

Remember those Adidas pants you could open on the sides? We called those "Schnellfickerhosen" (Quick/Fast fucker pants) in Germany.

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Yeah, society got it wrong when it made men wear pants and women skirts. Just from an anatomical perspective.

[–] Cethin@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I really want to wear kilts, but decent ones are really expensive and I don't want to spend that money on something I might not like (or more specifically I might not like bad attention from, because I do sadly care about that).

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I live in rural Texas, and no one has said a word about my kilt so far. Not even any weird looks.

[–] Fish@midwest.social 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I already wear a jock strap. How much more comfortable can I get?

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Way more comfortable.

Also, thongs are the solution to swamp-ass. Get some good wool ones and you'll never look back.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I got a couple and usually don't like 'em. Outside in the heat is great though!

[–] Cethin@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ironically, their Scottish where it's cold. A wool kilt would probably solve your issues for the cold.

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

You'd need some knee high socks to go with it, though.

[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

I feel like I'd get too cold with one

[–] medvedev@lemmy.world -2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Unironically, kilt was actually originally worn by man. (Outside of england ofc)

[–] prole@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago

Yeah, no shit?

[–] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Kilts are specifically men's clothing, so I'm not sure what you're talking about.