this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2025
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Honestly, if the culture war has been going on this long and the "greatest victory" they can show for it is feeling comfortable using the r slur again, thats just deeply sad for them lol.
I think wayyyyy more people than you realize say it. Even people you think are raging leftists. Most of us got quiet because we in general agree with left leaning things. Feel free to skim my profile...
But man... fucking EVERYONE says retarded. I'm very left leaning. Once I got away from a few select people... it was genuinely kind of a culture shock for me how many people say it lol.
I'm not advocating for people to just sling it like crazy.. and I know in a way that's kind of what's gonna happen to SOME EXTENT... but as someone who tried to push other folks toward not saying this in the past....
I 100% think it's a lost cause. I don't think it's going away. I don't personally think it's ableist and never did.
To make a comparison, from my perspective, it's kind of like turning the word "insane" into a slur.... we did some reaaaal bad things to people under the veil they were "insane." We put people in jail and mental hospital for most of their lives. We fried their brains with medication and lobotomized them both chemically and physically. It's not as common, but it is 100% an insult to tell someone they are insane or acting insane (I mean if they're bashing their skull into a tree or somethin that IS insane but that would also be an extreme example to call someone retarded over)
But we don't get upset about calling people insane today... everything has context and I think the context of retard has moved on from why people are offended.
A more apt comparison is being equally mad you called someone slow... I mean... retard is literally a word for slow in French... it kinda really only become ableist when someone wants it to be interpreted that way. At what point is simply calling someone stupid not also then ableist? Are we gonna crucify people if they use any other insult beyond "ignorant" that doesn't indicate the insultee's willingness in their stupidity? Or is "you lack/display a lack of intelligence" (the definition of stupidity) somehow more classy than slow and retarded in your eyes?
My 2c is that unless you expect to erase the word (you're not going to) you're better off helping to change the meaning in common view (most of us just think it means ya RLY RLY fkin dumb but use a word beyond stupid or idiot) and steal it back from them. Grinding to death and dividing OURSELVES internally over shit this nonsensical is killing us.
It's an easy code switch that uses their language against them and makes you more credible in their eyes 🤷🏻 as an ally I'm just saying not every battle can be won the way you originally wanted it to be
TLDR: bunch of different justifications for why I call MAGATs retards when they make stupid points in arguments
I also find it funny that calling someone a retard is considered less acceptable than calling someone an idiot. Especially when examined under an ableist lens.
Down syndrome, as a genetic condition, is out of their control
Being ignorant is a choice.
I don't know if it's the circles I'm around or what, but this is not my experience at all. As someone with a nonverbal autistic loved one who was bullied with this slur, I disagree with the idea that it doesn't cause harm to continue to use it. If someone uses it I ask that they don't use it around me and that's been respected. Language evolves over time, and we need to evolve away from using what was relatively recently a medical diagnosis as an insult.
Personally, I think the problem was that they were being bullied, not what specific names they were being called.
I think it's absolutely fair to ask someone not to use a word that you don't care for around you. The problem arises when you attempt to make that everyone's problem, not just yours.
Like don't use it all? I mean I don't know the last time I've said it but it does have uses besides calling people it. And why is it worse then stupid or slow dumb whatever as I imagine they where bullied with those words also.
Sounds like those bullies are fucking retards
The problem isn't them being slow/delayed, it's that they're inhuman monsters. Hope this helps, words have specific meanings and all that :)
I don't think it's ever going fully away. But it is still important to call it out when we see it.