this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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Anon tries to understand his coworker (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 day ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works
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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Why do you see a date as the default for men and women hanging out together?

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 2 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

That's just how social expectations are. I recommend you go ask a handful of single men you know (i.e. coworkers) whether they'd consider a 1:1 outing with a woman to be a "date." I'm guessing most would say yes.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 0 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Context matters: they're coworkers.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 1 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Exactly, they're coworkers where OP isn't certain if they were flirting or just being friendly, and other coworkers confirm she's flirting. To me that means:

  • they don't have a good enough relationship to tell the difference, so probably not "friends"
  • other coworkers don't seem to experience the same thing
  • claims to not have other friends (surely she'd mention a BF, no?)

So to me, that sounds very much like she's flirting, so it's totally understandable for OP to consider it a date.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 12 hours ago

Facts:

  1. Anon intended for this to be a date.
  2. Anon never said this was a date.
  3. Anon never asked if she was single.