Sadly, this is not the Onion.

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For true stories that you could have sworn were from The Onion.

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26
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Louisiana governor signs bill making abortion drugs controlled dangerous substances (apnews.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/engadine_maccas1997 on 2024-05-24 22:18:32.
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‘Fallout’ Producer Jonathan Nolan Wonders ‘Where Are All the Original Stories?’ Amid Rise of TV Adaptations (variety.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/King-Owl-House on 2024-05-24 21:56:41.
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2 WA men accused of selling fake Pokémon, sports cards in $2M scheme (www.fox29.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/indig0sixalpha on 2024-05-24 21:49:19.
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Blind and deaf dog Teddy got lost in a neighbor’s yard. Police called to help him shot him dead (www.inkl.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/indig0sixalpha on 2024-05-24 21:40:13.
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NFL sold out of Harrison Butker women’s jerseys following Benedictine graduation speech (www.kctv5.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/DCC_4LIFE on 2024-05-24 20:26:30.
31
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Man arrested for drunkenly teaching teen to drive, dances in street (abcnews4.com)
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Sctvman on 2024-05-24 19:32:14.
32
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ABBA goes to court to demand its right to throw eggs (timesofmalta.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/epiclevellama on 2024-05-24 18:11:17.
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Glue pizza and eat rocks: Google AI search errors go viral (www.bbc.co.uk)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/tyw7 on 2024-05-24 17:55:28.
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Teenaged Orcas sinking boats for fun. (www.usatoday.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/scarlettohara1936 on 2024-05-24 17:18:14.
35
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Arizona lawmaker says ChatGPT helped draft new deepfakes law (thehill.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/indig0sixalpha on 2024-05-24 16:24:52.
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'Montreal is pretty safe,' police say after 7 homicides in 10 days (montreal.ctvnews.ca)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/sqwuee on 2024-05-24 14:31:00.
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Priest bites woman's hand during altercation over Holy Communion, officials say (abcnews.go.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/TricksterWolf on 2024-05-24 14:02:36.
38
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Family stricken with rare brain worms after eating undercooked bear (arstechnica.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Similar_Rutabaga_593 on 2024-05-24 13:47:32.
39
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Woman Arrested For Battering Man. With A Cinnamon Roll. (www.thesmokinggun.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/AgentBlue62 on 2024-05-24 13:42:08.
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New Windows AI feature records everything you’ve done on your PC (arstechnica.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/mj281 on 2024-05-24 13:27:02.

They’re calling spyware a “feature”

41
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City of Sturgeon: Officer 'acted within his authority' when shooting, killing small deaf and blind dog (www.komu.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/stayslow on 2024-05-24 13:13:07.
42
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Ryanair passengers at centre of public alert over highly contagious measles risk (www.independent.ie)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/sonicated on 2024-05-24 08:23:56.
43
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Spotify dropping support for “Car Thing” — Suggests throwing it away. (support.spotify.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Remember-The-Arbiter on 2024-05-24 03:39:44.
44
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Pope clears way for 'God's influencer' to become a saint (www.bbc.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/yaredw on 2024-05-24 02:53:28.
45
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Prime Minister Narendra Modi convinced to be 'emissary of God', questions his biological origins (www.telegraphindia.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/EverSoInfinite on 2024-05-24 01:13:03.
46
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OpenAI to start using news content from News Corp. as part of a multiyear deal (abcnews.go.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/thieh on 2024-05-24 00:30:15.
47
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Clarence Thomas attacks Brown v. Education ruling amid 70th anniversary (www.axios.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/engadine_maccas1997 on 2024-05-23 20:59:15.
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North Carolina House pauses passage of bill that would ban masking for health reasons (apnews.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Stank_Dukem on 2024-05-23 20:16:18.
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Pope clears way for 'God's influencer' to become a saint (www.bbc.com)
submitted 10 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/moodytenure on 2024-05-23 19:43:54.
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California woman fined $88K after kids collect clams from Pismo Beach (abc11.com)
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Sandstorm400 on 2024-05-23 17:53:45.
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