A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.
Rules
You've missed out the Scottish snow badger. Like the regular European badger but about a third larger and completely white to blend into their (now disappearing) snowy highland habitats.
They are the sole reason hard plastic shell ski boots were invented after it was found that snow badgers have no problem biting through the old leather ski boots we used to use.
They hibernate through the summer months and only come out to hunt during the winter so it's very hard to get a photo of them.
Reality is that they'll both kill you. European badgers are just more classy about it.
"oh dear oh dear i'm so sorry about this, i really am."
European badger will poison your tea. American badger will mount your freshly-severed head above his oversize fireplace.
Brother in law had a huge wolf dog. The kind that can put it's paws on your shoulders and look at you face to face. Massive. He got in a tussel with a badger and got tore up, took two weeks to heal. Then took off and came back with a 40 lbs badger in his mouth. Overall a 40 lbs meth badger = 150 lbs wolf dog.
Badger Boogaloo 2 - Payback is a Bitch.
Dog had a bone to pick with that badger
That was a good boy
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🦡 🦡 🦡
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Fuck it, there is no substitute.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pzagBTcYsYQ
(if i could i would upload the original flash animation from albino black sheep)
I hate how hard it's to convey this masterpiece of a meme to younger audience now that Newgrounds doesn't use the music background anymore and ng isn't a default go to media place for them. Even Know Your Meme doesn't mention why this is created.
🐍
Wisconsinite here where the badger is native and the mascot for the University of Wisconsin is the Badger.
This meme is inaccurate.
The American Badger will also remove your kidneys and sell them on the black market as well, to support their meth habit.
The badger moniker comes from lead miners that initially settled the Wisconsin territory. They often didn't even bother building homes at first and just lived in their wildcat lead mines, like a badger.
I'm in new mexico and saw a badger crossing the road while I was driving to work. It stopped in the middle of the road, turned towards me and waited, like it was deciding whether or not to fuck up the large metal thing coming towards it. Then slowly turned and continued on it's way when it decided I wasn't worth it. No fear whatsoever.
He's just a lil guy dies
90% of the time Euro badgers do that
10% of the time they scream "Eulalia!" and tear you limb from limb
Redwallposting
I just want a seat at the table for one of their feasts.
Or split your skull with a halberd
Is there a Redwall community? I’m tempted to make one but I have no idea how
Not that I know of, go for it (idk how to make one either)
But the American badger turns out to just want to drink a beer and talk about sports whereas the European badger, after having sat you down for some tea and buttered crumpets, reveals itself to be a racist eugenicist
TBH, “reveals itself by shivving you anyway” is probably closer to the truth with Brittons and their tea.
Australian badgers are half this size, have no teeth at all, but can project venom 50ft from a gland in their nostril. The venom is completely harmless to humans, however it soaks into the skin and causes a pheromone to be emitted from the lungs such that when you are asleep, it attracts 14 different species of deadly venomous spiders that are attracted to your airway from up to a 4km radius.
This is all true but it's missing a key detail. The Australian badger is actually completely unrelated to the European and American badgers (which are mustelids). The Australian badger is a marsupial most closely related to the Tasmanian devil.
I'm pretty sure you made this up, so i believe it completely.
Badgers? We don't need no stinking badgers!
Mushroom mushroom.
Honey badgers will fuck up your shit simply because it was there.
could one say, they don't give a shit?
Having recently learned that they were bred specifically to hunt badgers, I wonder how a dauchshund would fare against North American badgers 🤔
Having met dachshunds, and having met American badgers, I'm going to put my bet on "poorly"
A couple hundred years of bred instincts aren't going to save the walking hotdog from the meth bear
I have three dachshunds. Two minis, Mary & Maizie, and a full size, Monty.
Mary we often call a little wolverine, because she can be vicious when she plays, making the most horrific noises you've ever heard out of any creature, much less someone that looks so absolutely disgustingly cute and adorable.
Her sister, Maizie, is the sweetest, kindest, shyest and nicest creature. Unless she sees a rat. Then it's terrifying. She makes no sound as she runs at full speed, and snaps it up and shakes at the speed of sound. I don't think her feet even touch the ground.
Monty is the biggest baby, he just wants to sleep and cuddle, even when he was a puppy. Unless you touch his mama. I am not allowed to hug my own mother, because he stands there and barks and howls and shoves his body between whoever's touching her and her. Lol.
If anything of them could take a badger it would Maizie, but I don't think even she could.
Also, this was originally supposed to be much shorter and more on topic, but then I had a chance to describe my dogs, and, y'know, muh babies!
It depends on how many dachshunds you're willing to lose.
