this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2024
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Theres a lot to unpack here, but really OP made a mistake by asking to go hiking. Thats a terrible first date idea and also isnt inherently date-y. Likely he was just missreading her kindness as flirting, but if he had asked her to dinner or coffee brunch it would've made his intentions more clear to her.
Not that it really matters because its fake and gay anyways.
Well, I read like a hundred times that going for a coffee is an incredibly boring date idea and doing some activity you both actually enjoy is much better.
For what it's worth, I hate the idea of a coffee / dinner date. Seems incredibly forced and like some kind of an interview. Though, I'm not dating and not interested in doing it, so I might be completely out of touch.
Coffee is boring if you are boring. That's why some people are against it.
There is also an art to keeping it short. No need to sit at a table for 5 hours. After an hour you should know if you want to go do something together.
With my current partner, we met "just" for a coffee at 11:30am. We got home at 7pm after said coffee, a walk, some drinks, dinner, and having had an awesome time.
Not to say I don't agree with you - keeping at least the initial intention short and sweet gives an easy way out in case either person isn't enjoying the date.