this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2024
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I struggle to consider myself a pacifist as the paradox of tolerance is a difficult thing to have to come to terms with and I'm fundamentally a flawed human being, but I so fundamentally hate the presumed human cost of "just doing business". I am filled with a searing, incandescent rage at all times, fueled entirely by the hypocrisy of liberal ideology and the cruelty of conservatives. I'm burning up and trying to avoid melting down just getting through the day, surrounded by people who seemingly willingly refuse to understand nuance on hot issues or that complicated problems oftentimes require complicated solutions. I'm tired, boss.
The thing is, you can be full of rage and still be against violence. Expressing rage doesn't have to be violent. People express rage in all sorts of non-violent ways, like writing or painting or sculpting.
My biggest weakness and most toxic trait is wanting to see bad people face consequences. That person weaving through traffic at high speeds without a turn signal, with no concern for the safety of everybody else on the road? Please drive off the road, crash, do something that drives home how selfish you are acting, and I hope it's expensive.
Politician campaigning on hate and saying that religion punishes 'wicked' people? I hope a loved one suffers some horrible disease and dies in pain.
Vote for an anti-abortion law? Watch your wife or daughter die of something entirely preventable. Refuse to provide exceptions for rape? Do unto others and all that, you know?
Nazi/christofascist/white supremacist? Worm food. Slowly.
I fix things, that's my whole driving purpose in life, and basically the only thing I'm particularly good at. I have never been very creative, I suck at writing , I'm not a great artist or sculptor or musician. It causes me so much pain and frustration to not be able to fix something, and so much rage to see people deliberately breaking things, doubly so when they delight in the suffering it causes.
Slightly off topic, but I find it interesting that in two of your examples it isn't directly the oppressor paying for their crimes directly, but someone (presumably?) uninvolved. Is there a reason for that? I'm all for karma, but it feels like this is still targeting innocents..
It's why I feel so conflicted. It's targeting those "the only moral abortion is mine" types in the only way they'll feel it. How wise do you get an old Conservative man to understand how important abortion is without someone "innocent" (assuming they weren't complicit) suffering from the consequences? I guess it's punishment in a more Biblical sense than moral consequence, but they need to feel the level of pain they inflicted on people and then be met with the same "God's plan" bullshit as they watch someone they care about suffer. I just don't think they'll ever understand otherwise